How perception and mirroring in sales count more than what you say in persuasive communication.
Science is now revealing the secrets of persuasive communication. Neuroscientists are beginning to explain mirroring in sales and other functions in our brains that enable us to perceive the intentions and perhaps even thoughts of others. New learning reveals how those with the necessary skills, can lead another person’s thinking.
Rather than repeat explanations and evidence, I have picked out some influential articles:
The Art and Science of Mirroring – Carol Kinsey Goman
It is likely that you will have heard of mirroring in sales as a technique for building rapport. Mirror neurons reflect the actions of others. These particular brain cells are widely associated with the capacity for empathy.
Empathy is one of a pair of traits often observed together in top sales performers – empathy and ruthlessness. Good empathy helps salespeople understand and sufficient ruthlessness enables them to take advantage. Mirroring in sales for persuasive communication rests first on understanding and then on self-control.
Mirror Neurons Intro – Kevin Hogan
You may have caught yourself wondering what another person is thinking. Perhaps you are aware of posing a thought question, Can I trust what I am hearing? Is he or she really interested or just playing along?
The stunning implication of mirror neuron research is that we have the ability to literally feel another person’s feelings. If we can feel another's feelings, we can intuit their thoughts and judgements.
Perhaps more disturbing is the idea that salespeople can intuit our thoughts by mirroring our body language and then lead thinking through shifts in their own body language. Those who can employ their non-verbal signals on purpose may have an edge over those who don’t or can’t. Mirroring in sales is certainly an advanced skill that might be mastered with persistence and practise.
How to Control Someone Else's Arm with Your Brain
This is a fascinating demonstration that illustrates the way our brains are a tightly integrated part of our bodies.
Stay with the Greg Cage talk. It starts a little slow. Hang in for the demonstration and be astonished.
So what should you do if you want to develop your sensory acuity and persuasive communication skills? What should you do if you want to learn how to read and control other people’s minds . . . or just defend your own? How can one master mirroring in sales? Here are some specific steps that you can take:
- Before an important meeting, decide to notice the trivial things like posture, limb position, breathing, eye movement, facial expression, tone, cadence, intonation, volume, emphasis etcetera. Try to do this without disrupting the normal flow of the meeting. Don’t act on anything you notice to begin with, just observe.
- After the meeting, write down what you observed and reflect on its meaning.
- Do this for every meeting until it becomes habitual. It might take 20 or more meetings.
- Next, add a careful observation of your own nonverbal reactions to the dialogue and the nonverbal signals of the people you observe. Expand your post-meeting notes to include self-observations.
- Keep this up until you habitually pay much more attention to the body language of others and your own. Perhaps another 20 meetings or conversations.
- Next, include observation and use of nonverbal language in your meeting preparation. Plan to establish rapport through matching and mirroring. Note how you will know if you have succeeded. Plan how to lead the other person or people to think the thoughts you want them to and say the things you want them to say.
Keep following the development programme until it is second nature and you have mastered the ability to match, mirror, achieve rapport and lead so that others willingly and unconsciously follow your thinking.
Article by Clive Miller
If you want to learn mirroring in sales or need to improve persuasive communication, get in touch. Telephone +44 (0)1392 851500. We will be pleased to discuss your needs or talk through the options. Alternatively, send an email to custserv@salessense.co.uk for a prompt reply or use the contact form here.
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